Heyy

Sorry I haven't posted in such a long time! Homework has been so crazy and so has life. I've just been really busy.

Anyways, we're basically done with Hamlet, except for an essay we have to write. Now its on to Julius Caesar. Fun. Not. We're starting a biology project on biomes, and our big history project is almost over. We only have two more projects left to do. Thank gosh! Math is going good, except that our teacher has been gone for two weeks, and we're all really confused on this quadratic equation solving by graphing stuff. Its insane. And we have our math midterm this month. Not fun at all. I might fail that...Well, not fail, but not get an A.

Guitar is going pretty good. I'm starting to get the hang of some stuff, but I'm definitely not anywhere near good. Its starting to sound a lot better though. My friend from camp, Bria, started going to Jen for guitar also, so that's pretty awesome. I'm glad, Bria's last instructor bit. However, I'm not sure how I'm supposed to get a P.E credit because its becoming too cold to go outside and exercise, and we don't have a treadmill. Ah! I'm looking on craigslist for a cheap one, just so I can walk on it for an hour a day so I can get my P.E credit in.

I just had a worship team gig thing last night, it was awesome. We were really good. And, even though I have a cold, I sounded great, not pitchy at all! Yay! I'm really excited. Apparently we'll be doing this like once a month now, kind of like youth group but not really. The W.T also started a new devotional, its pretty cool. I like it, hopefully doing all of this, and staying involved in the church will continually help me to look to God in this time of darkness, and not away from Him.

We have Max and Piper all weekend, since Greg and Jill are going to that Weekend to Remember marriage thing. It will be good for them, and there's even another mother coming to talk about what happened when one of her sons drowned. Jill will need that.

I think Megan might spend the night on Saturday, that will be pretty sweet. I haven't seen her in forever and I miss her so much! And then I'm going to see Twilight on Sunday with Fiona, Erin, and Emily. I'm really excited!

Homework.

Well, my last few days have been extremely busy. I was babysitting, then I had a horse show, and now I'm sick. And I have a test tomorrow that I haven't studied for. Due on Wednesday is part of that huge project thing, with a big freaking essay. I'm doomed. I get a headache just thinking about tomorrow's school day. Yikes!

I spent Halloween at home, doing nothing. I cried a lot. Peyton...It was really hard this year, because I spent last Halloween packing Peyton around on my hip. I miss that little girl so much. Last year, we had her in a Pooh Bear costume, and it zipped up in the back. Peyton loved to play with her belly button, and couldn't get to it. So in the car, on the way to Noah Nite, she burst out crying, saying 'I can't find my bwewy bwutton!' It was so funny, she got so upset. I looked through pictures of her from last Halloween...and bawled. I wonder what Thanksgivng and Christmas will bring...

SFQOTD: Adrift on your ocean floor, I feel weightless, numb and sore.

School, holidays, and tears.

Have I mentioned how much I love love love my new school? Its the best that I've ever gone to. I absolutely love it. I love all my classes, even though some of my teachers are a bit on the odd side (and ALL have odd names). I just really enjoy going to school. I enjoy the workload. It challenges my mind. I'm even starting to love my Algebra 2 class. In fact, solving by elimination is FUN. I think its starting to become my favorite class. Anyways, we just got a crapload, (and often times I've used the term crapload lightly. However, today I refer to it very heavily. It is a very heavy term today.) of history work to do. Its a packet on ancient Egypt that requires us to write about 7 essays, answer countless questions, fill out countless charts, and give countless presentations. We won't even be done before thanksgiving. It is freaking INTENSE. I'm excited!

On to the tears. My guitar instructor (who was also my youth group leader in junior high) Jen's dad passed away on Tuesday. He had been terminally ill for a long time, so it was expected, and Jen had done most of her grieving in advance, but it doesn't lessen the pain of course. Also, our grief share meeting is on Tuesday...which was especially hard because Jill was crying so hard that she made herself sick. It was horrible. =/

Halloween...I'm not sure what I'm doing on Halloween. My friend Katie wants me to go over to her house, and I really want to, except that I can't because of the horse show on Saturday. I hope I can find a way to make that work. If not, Fiona and me were thinking about hanging out at my house, where she could just spend the night and we would go to the show together. But, her parents probably have plans. So she's asking her mom. If none of those works out, then I'm just going to be home. I definitely don't want to work at the church, it just brings back way too many memories of me packing around Peyton on my hip at Noah Nite. So, most likely I'll end up talking to my far-away bff, Katie [ironically, I'm friends with a lot of Katie's] on IM for most of the night. Which doesn't bother me either. I'm worried about how Jill, Peyton's mom, is going to handle Halloween...maybe I should go sit with her or something?

Party!

So today was my mom's 50th surprise birthday party! Her actual birthday was on the 15th, but we had the party today. It was totally awesome, mom was so surprised. All of my moms closest friends were there. We had a bunch of research on what was going on at the times of mom's most important birthdays. I felt a little bad because for the last 3 weeks we've been lying through our teeth to keep her from finding out. We also had a ton of pictures of her from over the years, they were so cool. All the cards everybody got her were hilarious, I can't even explain them. Heck, I can't really explain the party besides that it was really cool, and awesome for my mom. Oh, and Jill (PJ's mom) made this really cool board, with pictures of my mom and Peyton on it, that says 'Life isn't measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take out breath away.' Its gorgeous, made out of wood...absolutely amazing. I got my mom a sweet purse and expensive chocolate. My gift doesn't even compare...But I'm glad. The board was beautiful. =]

Tears.

Wow, sorry I haven't posted in a while...and I don't think I could have, after what has happened to me. So here's a short update...

Well, I never did get all of my work done. But that's okay because I wasn't in high school and I don't have to worry about credits. Then, this summer Peyton died. She was like my little sister...heck, she WAS my little sister. I don't really want to get into that now...maybe later. Then, I started a new school. I go three days a week. Mondays, Wednesdays, and then Fridays are elective days. I'm taking all 11th grade courses. And I have an IQ of 135, lol. I'm 'gifted.' lmao. I've made a lot of new friends....and life still seems to enjoy punching me in the gut, reminding me 24/7 that my PJ is gone...

Half-Whooh

Whooh! I got 3 [almost 4] weeks of math done today! I know it wasn't my original goal, but hey I got some done!! I'll work extra-hard this weekend. I'm just so happy I was actually able to motivate myself to do some. That's basically all that my day entailed..I didn't go shopping actually, I spent the day with my horses. So, yeah.

I'm a failure

Why oh why oh why am I in such a schoolwork rut? I can not concentrate on my math at ALL. I've still got 24 weeks left to finish, and preferably by next Friday. So, if I start tomorrow, and continue throughout the weekend, doing 3 weeks of math a day, I'll have got 21 weeks done. So I'll have to do 3 more weeks. So, I'll add 3 more to my list tomorrow, or just do 4 weeks a day. Crazyyyy.

My dog Angel had an asthma attack today when I was walking her. I was SO scared. All the sudden she was just sucking in air, trying to breathe. Luckily it passed within 10 minutes. But I realized a horrible fact; Angels asthma is activity induced. She's overweight now, but shes always had this. So I'm going to be walking her a lot to help her lose the weight, and then we'll see how it goes from there. We only ran a teeny tiny bit, and she had an attack. I feel so bad. My poor puppy. =[.

Then, it was the season premiere of So You Think You Can Dance!!! The auditions are always awesome, considering some people make utter fools of themselves [one dude danced in his tightey-whiteys] or completely blow us away. I love this show, but my BFF Meg loves it even more. I'll have to call her tomorrow and she what she thought of the auditions. =]